Best day of my life

After that last post, I felt like I needed to say some good things about my wedding. It really was the best day of my life, one of the few days I really can remember. I got to change my last name, really shedding my father, and joined myself with the greatest man I know.

This is probably my favorite of just me. Do I look 21 to you? Just barely. Turned 21 on December 28th, got married January 3rd.

Supposed to be a shot of our rings, my untouched food just spoils it. I weighed 114 lbs on this day -wayyyyyyyyyyy too small.

This is "The Alleluia" - the quintet is all my family and it is an accapella piece we sing. We did it at the close of my reception.

I am livid.

My flippin WEDDING PICTURES are triggers now. This is because of all of the family that has deserted me since then, directly and indirectly. I have no one from my father's side anymore. My grandmother, two aunts and uncles and five cousins I grew up very close to. Gone. Because they don't believe me.

I went out on a limb and talked to a reporter a few weeks back, about DID mostly. He kept wanting to come back to the details of the abuse, but I am just totally not ready to say certain things out loud and knew the existance of DID and its treatment is what the article's focus was.

The next day, I got a call from her. Haven't spoken in many years. She wants to know why I am dragging her family's name through the mud, why I am going to a therapist who is putting ideas into my head and why I am lying.

Can't look at my wedding album without being reminded.

I

hurt

everyone

I'll never see those sweet cousins of mine again.

I have lost so many people.